Snooty Schnookums
by KianajLau
Summary: Annabeth Chase claims that all the kids who live in the 'rich' part of her neighborhood are, "...good for nothing dirtbags. Or money bags." and that "they... walk around like they're the gods' gift to the world... so arrogant... rude, annoying... and they're just… so snooty!" But when she meets 'snooty' Percy Jackson, will her opinion change? Oneshot Percabeth AU. Unknown Fan!


"Step-mom," I stated firmly, "I'm not going." The short, petite Asian woman in front of me frowned, "Why not, Annabeth?" I sighed. "Because," I began, speaking in an exasperated tone which implied I had said this before. Which I had. "I've been through every part of this huge compound. I've even run the perimeter of the golf field!" I hadn't _really_ been to _every_ part of the compound, but it was only a half lie, which meant it was also half truth, which, therefore, could be rounded up to the whole truth.

"Annabeth, come _on_." My step-mother spoke to me harshly. I refused to address her by anything other than 'Step-mom' or the occasional "Wicked Stepmother' and other such childish names to my friends, as she could never replace my mother. My birth mom had left without a trace but was never proclaimed dead nor alive. Even so, that meant she and Frederick Chase had never properly divorced and that she _might_ still be alive, so I always saw my stepmother as the women her father cheated on my mother with. My younger twin brothers, Bobby and Matthew, who were the offspring of Stepmom and Dad weren't so bad though. The only bad thing was that my 'parents' paid more attention to the twins in one day than they ever had to me the entire time they've been together. I was sick and tired of it.

"No." I stated defiantly again, "I am not going." My stepmother sighed. "Annabeth, I'm going over to have tea with a new friend who is moving in." I rose an eyebrow but said nothing. Who knew a person likelier could make friends? Well, I suppose it made sense. She was nice enough to the boys, but I'd always figured that was just done to spite me. "-a son your age." I hadn't heard her entire sentence, but I knew what this was leading up to. "Annabeth, you need to get out of the house more. Stop shoving your nose into all those dusty books of yours. Get a boyfriend! At least a crush. Or a friend." Ouch. That stung. I had friends, granted we weren't _that_ close and I never brought them to my house, but we still hung out at school all the time and had sleepovers at their houses. Of course, she wouldn't know I had friends. She never paid attention to what I did.

"I. Will. Not. Go."

* * *

Stepmom," I dragged out the last vowel as I complained. "Hush, dear. You agreed that if I took you with me, we would go to the," my stepmom scrunched her nose up in distaste, which I found horribly offending, "the… _library_." I swear to the gods, this woman…

But I kept quiet. For a little bit at least. "But Stepmom… All the people who live her are good for nothing dirtbags. Or money bags." She huffed, and I knew it was because all she cared about was money and hoped to one day become rich. How? By lounging on your lazy butt all day and mooching off my father's hard work? Or maybe by making rich friends in hopes that, I don't know, you'll become rich too just by standing next to them! I snorted out loud, but if the step monster noticed, she didn't say anything.

"Ooh, look!" She exclaimed, grabbing my arm, to which I recoiled at the touch of, and pointing over my shoulder. I turned my head as I yanked my arm away. Wow… This house was stunning. Just look at that- "It's over seven million dollars!" I rolled my eyes. It's all about the money with this lady. "I. Don't. Care." I ground out. "All these people here are just so dam…" I searched for the right word. "Snooty," I huffed out.

Stepmom rolled her eyes, "Well, I have a money bag friend with a snooty son, and we're going to visit them. Be nice, maybe one day you two will get married."

I shuddered in distaste. "Yeah right," I muttered under my breath. "The kids in this part of the neighborhood don't know how to appreciate anything. They just use their parents' money without a care and walk around like they're the gods' gift to the world. They're all so arrogant, and they think they look 'so good' what with their expensive clothes and makeovers, but most of the time they _do_ look so infuriatingly good-looking! And they're rude, annoying, most are dumb and don't know how to work for anything, and they're just… just… so _snooty_!" I couldn't find a better word for it.

"Well," a voice, much deeper and much more dreamy than my stepmom's voice said, the person's breath hot against my ear. I shuddered. "I wouldn't say _all_ of us are arrogant and rude. My mom sure isn't," I was surprised whoever this man didn't deny it about himself but stood up for his mother only. "But I don't just _think_ I'm 'infuriatingly good-looking'. I know I am." I sighed, "Arrogant, check."

I slowed down to a stop and turned around. Dam, he was right. He _was_ good looking. He had long, disheveled, raven black hair that fell perfectly on top of his head, covering some his gorgeous sea green eyes that seemed to swirl with different emotions and change like the tide in the ocean. His skin was tan and smooth without a single blemish on his face. He was tall, lean, and well built, but definitely not overly muscular. The perfect figure, in my opinion.

Gorgeous? _Check_!

He was around six feet tall and towered over me. I was five feet and ten inches tall, but with his shoulders back and that cocky smirk, he just radiated confidence which made me want to shrink back.

But I didn't. I held my ground and looked up at him. "Annabeth Chase." I held out my hand. "It's nice to meet you." He eyed my hand warily before letting out a small chuckle and taking it. "Percy Jackson. It's nice to meet you." He gave a boyish grin and I rolled my eyes at his childish behavior. "I already knew what your name was, by the way." I took a step back, away from him. He let out a light laugh, which sounded much better than his rich-kid-chuckle, and shook his head. "I mean, I was following you for a bit," I took another step back. "N-no! Not like that! I mean, just now, I heard you talking with your mom-"

"Stepmom," I corrected. He nodded his head like he totally got it, "Right, Stepmom."

There was an awkward silence before a sly smile spread across his lips, revealing slight dimples and gorgeous pearly white teeth. I never understood how people's teeth could be so white. I mean, sure, mine weren't a nasty yellow, but it wasn't completely white like those teeth whitening strips commercials. Or like Percy's. "So," I immediately came back to reality and looked expectantly at him. "Since we're going to be married one day, you said it yourself, 'yeah, right'," he changed the tone of my words though, "you can one day be my snooty schnookums." He 'booped' my nose and grinned that boyish grin again.

"Don't call me that." He gave me an innocent smile. "What's wrong, my snooty schnookums?" He cooed, coming closer to me. I involuntarily caught a whiff of his cologne. It smelt of the salty sea, mixed with a hint of chlorine and cookies. That was no cologne sent. That was all Percy. I found myself leaning in. "Woah," he mock exclaimed. "Kissing before the first date? I mean, if you're really that desperate for a piece of Percy…" I punched him in the shoulder. He winced and I heard him mutter an 'ow' under his breath. I smirked victoriously.

Looking over his broad shoulders, I noticed the stepmonster talking to a kind, middle-aged women a few yards behind. "That's my mom," I looked up as I heard Percy Jackson dreamily sigh. I smiled lightly. It was cute, how much he obviously adored his mom. "C'mon!" He said giddily, throwing his arm up and draping it over my shoulder casually. I was forced to be pressed against his side, not that I really minded. On this cool autumn day, he provided a nice warmth and he smelt nice too.

I leaned my head into his side, just a fraction of an inch, and inhaled deeply. I felt his chest rumble and looked up at him. I glared at him, "What?" He smiled again, still laughing slightly and shook his head, "It's nothing." I looked at him weirdly, but a cool breeze blew by and I caught another scent of that ocean and cookie goodness that I couldn't help but lean my head back into him. His arm seemed to wrap around me tighter now, shielding me from the cold.

Normally I would've killed a guy for acting so… bold around me, but Stepmonster over there took my jacket and scarf from me, claiming it was too cold. She'd taken it from me the second we stepped out the house door, when it hadn't even been locked yet. Typical.

"Hey," he asked softly, "why aren't you wearing a jacket?" I scoffed, "See that hideous Asian lady over there?" I felt him nod. "She stole my jacket and scarf the second we walked out the door." His steps faltered, causing me to trip over my feet a little, but he continued on like nothing happened. "I did think act jacket looked a bit too big on her."

"What, were you checking the step monster out?" He didn't comment on the naming part, but rose an eyebrow. "No, I'm just observant like that." I hummed in agreement. "Yeah, so observant that you didn't even notice your beanie fell off a few yards back there." I was lying, but I hoped he was a beanie wearing kind of guy. He took his arm off me, and I immediately missed the warmth, and turned around. I stifled a laugh. "Ha ha," he mock laughed. "You're just _so_ funny." He didn't put his arm around me again, which I found somewhat disappointing. I mean, Stepmom took my jacket and scarf, and my 'family' never brings me on the 'family' vacations to the beach anymore, nor do they ever bake _me_ cookies, so I guess I just found his smell comforting.

When we got within a few feet of our conversing mothers, stepmother for me, Mrs. Jackson turned around. She gave Percy a big hug and he returned it, planting a kiss on the top of her head. She turned to me, "Was Percy nice enough to you?" I laughed, "Of course. He was a true gentleman and you did a fine job raising him, Mrs. Jackson." I felt kind of awkward saying that, it wasn't like I was in the place to judge whether or not she rose her child right, but Percy, who was standing behind her, seemed happy enough with my response, shoulders sagging in relief, and Mrs. Jackson beamed with pleasure. "Thank you, I tried my hardest. But please, call me Sally."

"All right," I smiled, before adding on, "Sally." She laughed again and brought me into a hug right as I extended my arm and was about to say, "Annabeth Chase." I must've looked shocked because Percy smiled warmly at me and the Wicked Stepmother rose an eyebrow. A fake, penciled in eyebrow that is.

I leaned into _Sally_ 's embrace and hugged her back. When she pulled back, I felt slightly embarrassed at how hard I was clinging onto her, but he just smiled warmly, giving me an affection motherly gaze that made my heart melt. "Come along," she waved her hand in her direction as she walked to the front door, ushering us in. "We have cookies!" Percy perked up immediately and he ran the distance in record time, screaming, "I love you, Mom! Blue cookies!" And I could still hear him whooping as he entered the house. Sally smiled again, and so did I, but my stepmom just scoffed. "Is that how parents raise their kids, nowadays?" Sally lowered her head.

"No, no!" The stepmonster corrected herself, "I meant to say, 'how nice!' I mean, Annabeth certainly never shows _her_ parents how much we're appreciated." I just stood there, gaping. They were already inside by the time I decided to stalk into the house, following after them.

The smell that hit me when I walked through those doors was heavenly. It smelt like home.

* * *

"It's been so nice seeing you guys again!" Piper exclaimed, sounding genuinely excited that school was starting again. "Yeah," Katie agreed. "Though those extra few weeks of Summer Break were nice… I wish the Principal could fall down another flight of stairs," Thalia spoke wistfully as we all stopped and stared at her. "The Principal's your _Dad_ , Thals," Grover said nervously. The punk girl just shrugged her dark hair that had grown longer over the summer falling behind her shoulders.

I just laughed along with the rest of the group. "So, what have you guys been up to?" Rachel was the first to speak up, "I've finished a lot of my art projects, but I need a new subject to draw… Annabeth, I think you'd do good as a model… I just need a guy…" Her eyes brightened as she pointed over my shoulder, suddenly, causing me to jerk back as she almost poked my eye out. "Him!" I looked over my shoulder, as did everyone else on my side of the group circle, but everybody's jaw fell open, though mine was for a different reason. Percy Freakin' Jackson was walking through the doors, radiating his annoying but admirable confidence as he looked around the school casually, hands stuffed in his jean pockets, and light blue V-neck shirt, straining against his muscles. When he saw me, his whole face brightened and he walked toward my group with a slight bounce in his step.

We had become pretty close over the summer, and I'd even brought him to my house before, somewhere I'd never brought any of my school friends before. Besides Luke and Thalia, though Luke's in college now and Thalia is in the year above me. I looked back at my friends and saw Jason instinctively pull Piper close to him, I saw Grover staring up at him in awe, Silena was ogling him, but kept close to Beckendorf, Rachel was looking him up and down, Katie had a dreamy expression on her face, and Thalia just looked bored and uninterested.

"Hey, Snooty Schnookums," he said, as he threw his arm over me and kissed the top of my head. He'd been doing that ever since I told him it was cute how close him and his mother were. Everyone's jaw just dropped further. I was nervous and slightly embarrassed, but I did my best not to let it show.

I shook his arm off me and slapped him in the face. "Seaweed Brain! You never told me you were going to Goode!" He chuckled nervously, "I thought a Wise Girl like you would've been able to figure it out." I rolled my eyes as I shoved him away from me playfully. "Guys," I said turning to my friends. "This is Percy Jackson."

Everybody was silent for a moment before Piper and Silena squealed, "Ship!" while clapping their hands together like they were spazzing seals playing patty cake.

"Oh gods," I muttered under my breath, but the Seaweed Brain who had, once again, slung his arm over my shoulder just grinned, placing another soft kiss on my head that for sure made Silena faint.

* * *

"You're coming over to my house today, aren't you?" Percy asked, his arm over my shoulder once again. He said he only did that because of my height and I was the perfect armrest. "Yup," I said, popping the 'p'. He grinned his boyish grin. "Sweet." I rose an eyebrow, "Will there be blue cookies?"

"Hellhounds, yes."

He and I both laughed before he was yanked forward and found himself face to face with Drew Tanaka. "Hey, Percykins," she cooed. A month or two after Jason and Piper officially began dating, Drew finally gave up on the blonde haired blue eyed captain of the football team. That was good for 'Jasper' as they were called, but now, she had her sights set on Percy. "Um, hey, Drew…" I leaned up to him and whispered, "More like Drool." Percy snickered. He knew I didn't mean 'Drool' in the sense that 'she's so gorgeous all the guys drool after her'. No, I meant she looked like literal drool.

Her eyes snapped to mine and she glared at me, her tiny Asian eyes becoming smaller than they already were. Not that I have anything against Asians, and I know they're not _all_ beady eyed selfish creatures, but hey, I've only seen three Asians in my life before and two of them… well, yikes. Not a good look for Asians across the world.

"What're you looking at?" I opened my mouth, my gray eyes boring into hers, but Seaweed Brain beat me to it, "She's watching a b-brat flirt with her boyfriend in front of her." Drew and I gaped. Wow, I never thought I'd say our names together in a sentence unless the words following that were 'couldn't be more different' or 'hate each other'. Percy hugged me tighter against him, leaning down to peck my cheek. "Come on, my Snooty Schnookums, we have somewhere to be." He pushed passed Drew and we walked to the cafeteria together, my heart fluttering as I remembered him calling me _his_ and the soft kiss he'd left on my cheek. The first kiss I'd _ever_ received anywhere on my face. I'm Percy's…

I'm _his_ Snooty Shnookums and Wise Girl. And he's my Seaweed Brain.

* * *

"C'mon, my Schnookums! Please?" Percy whined over the phone. I rolled my eyes but smiled fondly as he, once again, called me _his_. "What's the point?" He sighed irritably, no doubt running his hands through his hair that was in desperate need of a trimming. "I-" I sighed. "Fine, Percy." He whooped victoriously and I shook my head smiling slightly. What would I ever do without this boy?

I walked out the door, not bothering to say goodbye to anyone or tell them where I was going. They wouldn't care anyway. I shivered in the cool Spring air as my dress lifted in the breeze. I pushed my arms down by my side, gripping the edges of the dress. I shivered again when the cool breeze hit me and I pulled my cardigan closer to me. I stood there, only having to wait for a few minutes, before Percy came driving up, his dark, navy blue Prius, glinting in the remaining moonlight. He opened the door and smiled at me as he stepped out.

He took long strides up the steps to my house before taking off his blazer and draping it across my shoulders. "M'lady," he offered his elbow and I placed my hand on it. He chuckled and I struggled to contain my laughter. He walked me to the passenger side of the car and opened the door, giving a dramatic bow. I mimicked a posh, English accent, "Why, thank you, my good sir." He closed the door and, as he passed the front of the car, I couldn't help but stare at him.

When the door opened again, Percy gave a loud sigh. "You think she's still watching?" I shrugged, "Probably." He began driving and the ride started out silent- well, mostly silent. But it was a comfortable mostly silence. Percy drummed his fingers against his knees, and then bounced his leg up and down, alternating between the two. I did the same, humming under my breath, or just wiggling my toes inside my flats. I began thinking back to the beginning of our friendship. I smiled at the first time he ever called me 'Snooty Schnookums' and wondered how _he_ got to be so 'snooty'.

"Hey, Perce," I said softly. "Yeah, Wise Girl?" I fidgeted in my seat. "This might be uncomfortable to talk about for you, but I've been wondering how you afforded a house like yours. I mean, Sally's a writer and Paul's a teacher, and you… you don't have a job." I laughed a little, but he didn't, so my laughter died down quickly.

"My… my real dad died. Out in the ocean. He was in the Navy, or so my mom tells me. She remarried this guy, Smelly Gabe, I called him." I smiled to myself. That sounds like my Percy, all right. "And he was a cop, but he was always drunk and used all my mom's money… and he was… abusive. I guess one day I just had enough," his voice cracked and so did my heart, "I called the cops on him. I called the cops on a cop, ironic huh, and, it turns out, he was a fraud. They researched into his background and found he was… like, I dunno, a wanted guy or whatever. Reward money and stuff was given, compensation or whatever, and then… I'm not sure. Our financial situation got better, she met Paul at the student-teacher conferences at Goode… We moved here after they got married… and stuff. We bought a nice house with the money and our savings and… uh, here we are."

Even if it hadn't been the most eloquently spoken speech, the way he spoke, his eyes focused on the road ahead, looking much duller than usual, looking slightly misty, the slight downturn of his mouth, the way he slouched and how his voice cracked when he told the story… "Oh, Perce," I leaned over and gave him a hug. "I'm sorry for asking." He brought one hand over and wrapped it around me, driving with one hand on the steering wheel. "It's fine, Schnookums. I''m glad I told you."

"I'm glad you told me too." We just sat there for a bit before I realized we weren't going anywhere. "Why'd we stop?" I looked up at him to find him grinning down at me. "We're here."

So, it may not have been the perfect date. He tried to do the Lady and the Tramp spaghetti thing with me, but we'd had different noodles in our mouths, so his eyebrow wiggling was for nothing. We talked about this, and we talked about that, and so while it may not have been perfect, (I punched the waiter when I was talking with hand gestures describing the buildings I wanted to make, which resulted in Percy laughing and then choking on his cherry coke died blue) it was the best date I could ever ask for.

But, according to Percy, it wasn't over yet.

When he dropped me off in front of my porch that night, opening my door and walking me up the steps like the gentleman he was, he leaned in, and whispered, "Be my real girlfriend." Of course, I said yes. And then we kissed under the stars, like we were the only ones alive and, for a moment, nothing else mattered. An asteroid could have hit the planet and wiped out all life, and I wouldn't have cared.

This boy was mine, and I was his.

And one day, just like he'd promised the first day we met, I'd become his _official_ snooty schnookums.

And I did.

* * *

 **How'd you like that quote from Uncle Rick? Nice, right? My second fanfiction on this webstie and I'm so happy! Anyway, check out my first fanfic, the Thaluke one! For now this shall be marked as complete, but, one day, I might write up the proposal..? Maybe!**

 **~ KianajLau/Unknown Fan! out!**

 **Written July 2 and 3 of 2017**

 **(July 14 added ' _official_ ' before snooty schnookums at the end to make it clearer... Yeah... And I love how many readers I have! Love you all so much!)**


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